because you just need to be you

Sally Lloyd Jones shared on Andrew Osenga's podcast The Pivot about her life and within it inspired me and this post about the beauty of being yourself.  Lines may blur as her words, my thoughts about them, and the other thoughts included intertwine, but God is the divine inspiration behind us both so I hope grace and forgiveness can be extended if I miss a few acknowledgements throughout.  To listen for yourself visit here.

I have fond memories of my Grandaddy.  Actually, they are beyond just merely fond, they are literally heartwarming and can, in an instant, bring the sweetest of smiles to my face.  He loved me, but not in the typical he has to because I'm related to him way.  He LOVED me in a doted upon me, hid money in the couch cushions just so I could find it, ate dinner with a one year old in his lap just because she wanted to be there way.  He died when I was in Jr. High after suffering from dementia for a couple years and a little part of my heart still hasn't healed from that loss, not only the loss of his life, but of the relationship that that disease can rob from us even when physical presence is still intact.

The memories I cherish the most are the ones where we were just outside sitting and he, in some way, shared his life with me.  Whether funny comments, stories of his childhood, playing rock school on the front steps, or lessons on how to flip a pocket knife and get it to stand straight up on a picnic table, he invested in me with time and words.

Recently, while listening to a new podcast--and pretending that I am so on trend saying that instead of admitting that I am really late to the party--there were more words shared from a wise soul that took me beyond just wanting to sit and rock next to her on the porch while I soaked them in, to literally grabbing a notebook--or keep app in this case--in an attempt to write down all the things.  The heart of the message shining through for me was the beauty of being yourself and as a person who has struggled with seeing herself as less when others seem more it was perfect, and possibly life changing.

We each have qualities we admire in others.  Seeing from a distance a mother who is patiently dealing with a temper fueled toddler, a teacher who can go with the flow of a class full while keeping positivity, or a coach or athlete who keeps his cool and encourages calmly instead of belittling are just a few of the ways the world can see a heart of love behind actions and give us mentors to speak into our lives ways we can grow and change.

But, when we, living in this fallen world like we are, are tempted to look at another and not just see what qualities we admire in them but begin to Envy them instead we are, in that moment, making the situation about us getting elevated instead of God getting glorified. 

In her interview, Sally Lloyd Jones commented that we judge our stories halfway through our stories, but we have to wait because it is only at the end where we can start seeing the pattern of what is being done.

This can also be taken a step further. As we judge our stories halfway through, we are often judging everyone else's as well and as we view them from the outside our opinion is tainted all the more as we have no way of knowing the hardships, knowledge, and heart change that have built them up to now.  There's a reason teachers tell you to keep your eyes on your own paper.  Your life is God's work on you, not another.

It is in these times where Paul's words are not only encouraging, but help streamline focus.  For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of another (Romans 12:4-5)  

In Corinthians he spells it out even more clearly for those in the "please speak to me like I'm a 5 year old" group--my hand is raised here people.  If the foot should say, "because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body," that would not make it any less a part of the body.  And if the ear should say, "because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body," that would not make it any less a part of the body.  If the whole body were an eye, how could we hear?  If the whole body were an ear, how could we smell?...

"We on our own have a hierarchy of what is worthy and what isn't.  God does not have that.  He sees each of us as what He created us to be and if we are filling that role it is beautiful and helps bring order to the chaos which is this fallen world." ~Sally Lloyd Jones

Beauty in the chaos.  He makes the broken things beautiful.

C.S. Lewis says, "even in literature and art, no many who bothers about originality will ever be original; whereas if you simply try to tell the truth, without care twopence how often it has been told, you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it."

We are each fearfully and wonderfully made specifically crafted in the biggest story before it was even set into motion and our part in it can not be performed by another.  In the wise words of Ernest T. Bass, it's "all mine, nobody elsies.

The most eye opening, stopping in my tracks, filling my heart part of Sally Lloyd Jones' interview came because of this simple yet, profound statement, "we spend more time comparing ourselves to other people than valuing what comes easy to us.  We think because it comes easy to us then it must not be worthwhile, but the reason it comes easy to us is because God has gifted us with the ability to do it."

God has given each of you[us] a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts.  Use them well to serve one another.  1 Peter 4:10

As said earlier, when we envy we making the situation about us getting elevated instead of God getting glorified.  When we are focused on honoring God instead we can't help but do it with those gifts we have been given.

Howard Thurman wrote, "Don't ask what the world needs.  Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it.  Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."  There is no better One to listen to in this regard, than the person who in the beginning gave you Life.

Don't ever let yourself forget that Jesus has purchased a future for you that is better than anything you could have dreamed or planned for yourself.

More than anything this week, and beyond, I am praying that you can see the beauty in just being the you you were created to be and the need for more of that in the Kingdom, pray for me.

for when you need to remember what you are given

There is something about being around small children that will cause you to question your sanity. They do not have to have come directly from your body or call you mom, nor does it need to be the same sweet small person following you around.  All that is required is for one or more to be a constant part of your life in some form or fashion. The continued presence of such small people with their energy and words and lack of filters and impulsiveness and overall beautiful not at all self-controlled thirst for life and the actions that are produced from that miniature minded carpe diem philosophy effects your brain cells in a way that causes them to flit away almost without being noticed until you try to speak an intellectual thought without time to process your words before they are let loose.

As a former babysitter, dance teacher, school teacher, and now mom, there have been a slew of wonderful children in my life and therefore a mass exodus of brain cells that once had my back when attempting to produce intellectual thoughts.  Now, and I am hoping you can relate, phrases will at times just spill out of my mouth that cause me to literally stop in my tracks and truly wonder if I have in fact finally gone crazy.  The carefree teenager and young adult mind of this mid thirties woman never imagined I would utter the phrase "We do NOT wash our hair in the toilet."  Never imagined I would stand in confusion trying to discern why I would have strung any of the commands together that I had just given and what on earth did they mean anyway.  I have felt, on more than one occasion, much like Ernest T. Bass learning to read and write.  Nohuntbewareopenandclosenocredit can sound like more Shakespeare than the times when my words come tumbling out in a hurried directive towards a blonde boy or three.

Then, there are those purposeful nonsense words you say, ones that can only be uttered at children for fear of losing your adulthood membership card when said aloud to anyone over 4'6".  Just last week while sitting in the lobby of our youngest's preschool, the other parents and I giggled to each other when hearing a lovely teacher sing a song to her three year olds about flushing the potty and washing their hands.  Every part of me was thankful for her desire to remind and teach about proper hygiene, but that sing song direction initiated a waterfall in my thoughts of phrase after phrase I and others have used to teach and remind depending on the situation at hand.

The one phrase that came before any others is one I guarantee you have heard and possibly said, not only to a child but maybe even to yourself.

You get what you get and you don't pitch a fit.

Its usefulness in the situations in the lives of children is countless.  Its lessons valuable.  Be thankful for what you are given.  Be content.  Do not compare what you have in your possession to what is in the hand of the one next to you.  Have self control in your reactions.  Do not pitch a fit over something that has just been handed to you free of charge.  Adults have uttered these words for so long that children will say them to each other, say them to themselves, and if the said grown up is honest, they have had to turn this phrase around on themselves as well.

In daily life on this world, it is a helpful rhyme that gets quickly to the point and nips many things in the bud before tantrums arise, but somewhere along the line, this quick child-rearing colloquialism can at times shift the view of who God is in our lives.  I have caught myself equating God with a teacher passing out suckers at the end of the day, reaching into the bag with no rhyme or reason, and handing out what happened to be in His hand to the next one waiting in line all the time reminding me that I get what I get so don't pitch a fit.

Forgive me for my doubt of your perfect plan.  Forgive me for my lack of Trust.  Forgive me for forgetting at times the Truth of who and what You are, Creator, Omniscient, God with me.  Forgive me for not remembering your Love.  For not remembering I am your Special Possession.

For it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure (Phil. 2:13)  He is intentional, specifically designing your heart and life to work out His good for the Kingdom.  He is not random.  You do not just get what you get.  You get what you are given.  You get what He gives.  

What He gives is abounding Love (Ps. 86:15), divinely orchestrated gifts from the Spirit (1 Cor. 12), every spiritual blessing (Eph. 1:3), a holy life --not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace (2 Tim 1:9)

And even better--maybe not better but just as amazing--is the fact that we are told to ask, to make our heart known, then sit as the peace of God that surpasses all understanding guards are hearts and minds then to Trust what comes next because the Lord is at hand. [paraphrase of Phil 4:5-7]

Semantics are important, different ways of phrasing can truly change how a person responds to your instruction or advice, but this is more than semantics, this is better understanding of who God is in your life and who you are because of Him.

We don't get.  We are given to by an Almighty Father.  And we are given so that we can give in return.

Everything you come across in life is ordained and allowed, nothing comes as a surprise to the one holding you in His hands.  It will not all be easy, but it will not all be hard.  It will not all be what you may have requested or imagined, but it will all draw you to Him in life altering, heart altering, magnificent ways.

Your world may even fall apart, but I promise it will get rebuilt.  Slowly or quickly, painfully or peacefully, pieces will come together and what was once crumbling will be made strong when it is built on the Cornerstone.  And you can use all of it to advance the gospel (phil 1:12) and to declare His glory (Ps. 96:3).  

Don't think about what you get, think about what and who you have been given.

Praying faithfully for you today, pray for me.