Wednesday, March 16, 2016

You don't have to be perfect

"You don't have to be perfect."

Written in my brief bio on one of the many social media venues is 'wife, mama, and recovering perfectionist who is continuously learning to cling to the righteousness of Christ instead of her own.'  A needed reminder as I go about my minutes, hours, and days expecting myself to be more than I'm capable of, more than I am asked to be.

Last night with a large glass of the only wine I have so far trained myself to like, I recounted my day's events to my husband who had a heckuvah day himself.  There were no tragedies, no life altering difficulties, and with my self enforced 24 hour time lapse I can see the array of positives that were scattered throughout, but during the retelling there was frustration and defeat.

The domino effect of things out of my control, not happening in the way they were planned to happen, caused delays, no car, lots of walking in the Georgia heat with a four year old, exhaustion, missed meals, another late bedtime for boys, late night chores for mama and left me feeling wiped out and a wee bit teary. 
These side effects were not from the various situations themselves but the thought of how I could have handled them all better than the "I didn't snap at anyone or have an emotional meltdown."  Second guessing is my hobby and guilt a constant unwanted companion so the list of could haves and should haves doesn't ever take long to compile and begin their finger shaking and looks of shock and shame.

Hindsight is always 20/20, lessons can be learned from each and every situation and sanctification continues for as long as we walk this earth.  But reflection and correction is much different than self deprecation.

After the glass was empty and my husband shared that the lack of snapping and melting were actual successes in his view and not the failed test I assumed them to be I felt the words again in my heart.
"You don't have to be perfect."

A search for truth brought me to this..."It is true that the Bible calls us to be "perfect as [our] heavenly Father is perfect” (Matthew 5:48). The Greek word for perfect here is telios. It means “brought to its end, completed, or perfect.” So, to be “perfect” in this sense is not how perfectionists so often imagine it. Rather, it is to be completed in Christ. Philippians 1:6 says that completion is the work of God. He created us, saved us, and is faithful to perfect us."

"You don't have to be perfect"

This is my Good Will Hunting statement.
The one that bears repeating.
The one that when lovingly said over and over will simultaneously wreck me but uplift me, hurt me but heal me.  It leads me straight to where I always need to be, abiding in Christ and leaning solely upon the work He's done.

My question is what is yours?  What are the words you need to hear over and over until you finally believe them and then again when they seem to slip away.  We are all learning the same lessons, they just come through a never-ending variety of experiences.  But at the beginning, middle and end of all of them is a loving Father drawing you to Him by whispering in your ear, and shouting when necessary, the words that pierce your flesh so they can touch your Spirit.

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