You know you've hit it the minute it happens. In the middle of conversation you ask the right question or mention the right topic and suddenly the face in front of you lights up in a new way. Eyes open wide, smile even wider, their countenance changes as they become almost giddy and All In to the conversation. Child or adult, introvert or extrovert, the scenario doesn't change, because when you find the right thing we all become giddy, over spilling with words that cannot be hemmed in because now we are talking about our passion.
A passion is more than a hobby, it's more than a delightful pastime, a passion makes people come alive. It taps into the deepest essence of who God created them to be and what he created them to do. "What does it mean to be an ambassador of the King?" Paul David Tripp asks. "It means reflecting his message, his methods, and his character wherever he has placed you." Wherever in whatever.
As easy as you would think it would be to know your passion, to know what you were wired to do, it is not. It takes thought, concentration, and noticing. Sometimes it is almost impossible to do on your own. In an interview on Andrew Osenga's podcast The Pivot, Bebo Norman mentions how integral our community is in regards to seeing ourselves in a true light. Our community, the people we have built our lives with and around, see us in ways we can never see ourselves. They see us without preconceptions and veiled covered eyes. They are the ones looking and they are the ones who can see when we light up.
But even when a passion is pinpointed, it is even harder sometimes to allow your self to succumb to it. As odd as that sounds, it is so very true. We, in our human desire to please and succeed, stuff passions placed within us and though you may be able to justify the why with a million different reasons, I feel as if they all boil down to two root things, expections and fear.
--though they are just another way of saying the two roots of all sin, pride and unbelief. Thanks to my PCA loving in-lawed family for teaching me that little tidbit within a week of knowing you--
1. Expectations- Shakespeare said that "Expectation is the root of all heartache." and I can name quite a few of his works where the reality of this was played out. We find that thing that makes us tick, that makes us feel alive, but then we look at it from another angle and then another and doubt seeps in. It doesn't "look" as impressive as I thought. It doesn't look as productive as this other thing may be. If I sit around the tables at my high school or college reunion or family gathering and chat about it, how will it sound? Will people understand or will they laugh it off. Oh comparison, how you wheedle your way into every scenario and thieve all the joy.
2. Fear- We can be scared of the oddest of things, here's a quick list I came up with a few years ago with minimal effort, but a significant one on our lists is fear of the unknown. When finding your passion, and especially if that passion will require a change of occupation, living, etc. fear of not knowing the end result frequently outweighs the joy that could come from living your passion out. The unpleasant known is much more comforting than the potentially pleasant unknown. How confusing our human minds can be. The passion we want, but the leap to it we can almost not bear.
Corrie Ten Boom speaks directly to this when she challenges us to "never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God."
When reading in Jeremiah there is a story where the people of Judah keep trying to escape their land because they are afraid of the new enemy king that has taken it over. After trying many solutions--running away--on their own with only terrible things happening they come to Jeremiah and say tell us what the Lord wants us to do and where he wants us to. Whatever it is, we will do it. After ten days Jeremiah comes back and says stay in the land God has given you and the king will keep you safe, but if you flee to Egypt he will come after you and kill you. Any guesses where these fools go? Fear kept them from listening. The fear that came with trusting a future they did not know overpowered the trust that God always knows.
for more thoughts on fear and tackling it read this
Maya Angelou has a beautiful quote that reads "there is no greater agony then bearing an untold story inside of you." This meaning does not just pertain to writers, it pertains to us all. Within each of us is placed a story, whether in the form of words, talent, or gifts. These passions demand to be let loose. Your story is there to be used. Blocking it out will not cause the flame to be extinguished, it sends that flame deep down into your soul where it will slowly burn until it can no longer be ignored and you have to bring it to light, give it the oxygen needed to grow. To leave it stuffed, burning in the darkness, is agony.
One of my favorite things is when great wisdom and truth comes out of nowhere from unexpected places. A always remembered moment will be sitting around my in-laws dining table listening to my husband's grandmother and her friend talk. I had never met this friend before and had never heard of her before but the story her life contained was one of inspiration and amazement and the best part was how casually she shared it. The humility that came through from her normal tone and laughter made it all the better to listen to. Somewhere in the middle of a story she flippantly said, "there is just no better place to be than in the middle of God's will."
It took quite some time to sort through that comment. But how do I know if it's God's will? was asked over and over. I have been told before that it is ill-advised to dwell too much on that topic. Instead just assume that whatever I am doing is God's will because if I wasn't supposed to be doing it I wouldn't be. It's easy to argue many sides of that. What it came down to was the feeling of agony and why is it there. Is there something missing, something that could feel more "right", something else that should be in my life to make this unsettled feeling feel settled.
We all do not have the luxury of having our greatest passions be the way we make our living, but we do all have the ability to make our passions an integral part of our life. When you succumb to it, when you look and see the gifts you've been given and the passions that have been placed in your heart and work towards integrating them into your time, your actions, your life, all of a sudden that turmoil inside settles. It doesn't meant a dream life starts, or problems dissipate, or you get to quite your job, though sometimes it can. Instead you just feel at once that yes, this is what I was created to love, where I was created to show love, and you begin to understand that yes there might just not be a better place than in the middle of His will.
I don't know your passion, and you might not know it yet either, but I urge you to pray that it will be found, pray to see how you were uniquely created to work and show off His glory in the middle of our world. I'll be praying for you, pray for me.
Now...
Go and be as the butterfly. Go unfettered by cares, by the Infernal bondage of the Mortal. Go with a light heart, trusting God and giving thanks. Go and gather unto yourselves so you can pour out to others. ~Jan Karon, through Father Tim
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