Wednesday, December 6, 2017

for when we expect perfection from the imperfect

Auburn lost.  My sports lovers know what I'm talking about.  If you are not one of those, bear with me, this is going somewhere non sports related I promise.  They lost.  And while the mom and dad were disappointed, the ten year old and eight year old were devastated.  When your excitement and hope raises to high levels of what could be and are then dashed, it's a hard and hurtful fall.  When you're a young boy living in the state of Georgia and have to walk into school the following Monday and see the dreams you wanted written on the face of another, it stings.  Lessons are certainly learned in good situations and bad, but man doesn't it feel like one way outweighs the other?

While watching Auburn not win a title this year, six pieces of furniture sat outside in the driveway waiting to be brought in.  Warm air of day mixed with the cool air of night and condensation took those beautiful just completed refinished pieces and coated them with a milky white finish that couldn't just be wiped away.  The next afternoon amidst the frustration of a clogged paint sprayer in a desperate attempt to just finish something the right way, tears of anger and disappointment collided into a minor meltdown.  This time the ten year old and eight year old were happily watching a Merry movie while mama was devastated.  Lessons are certainly learned in successes and failures, but man doesn't it feel like one way outweighs the other.

Even without the perfectionist mentality of needing a blemish free situation, everyone loves a perfect ending.  Everyone wants a perfect outcome.  Everyone wants to perform perfectly.  Everyone wants to be treated perfectly.  The moment the end result doesn't meet the expectation created, friction starts, and sometimes that friction becomes a firestorm.

While trending topics do not often make their way into these thoughtful sharings there is one that has been on my mind for weeks.  Not so much the "what" that is happening, although that is sadly present, it's the wondering of the outcome.  What will the fallout be for those involved and how will our world change because of it?

I am cautiously treading forward begging for grace to be given while reading with the promise that I can do my best talk to it through with anyone who by chance misunderstands or misinterprets my meaning.  Or even better, to talk it through with someone who understands life much better than I and can help me discern the situation, can help bring wisdom into my life as I look upon it.  There are no real answers coming, just questions to ask and think about, and a pointing once again to the sole source of Truth.

Men of fame are falling like flies.  Each day another one has fallen from grace and hit a bottom so rocky there doesn't seem to be anywhere else to go.  Rightly so, as their actions are despicably  hurtful and harmful.  My mind, like the minds of many other girls and women, has gone back to times in my life where the dominance of a male figure convinced me to do things, say things, and act in ways outside of my thought-to-be character, due to naivety and fear.  And while there are just as many times that my own sinful heart encouraged me to engage in behaviors that were known to be wrong, the female in me still rejoices that there is a seemingly male witch hunt going on to claim those who have spent their life preying on weaker vessels to fill their own needs.

The redeemed part of me is heartbroken as I am reminded how much we have all fallen from grace and how much this world likes to demand perfect behavior without the presence of a perfect Savior.

We annihilate without understanding.  We condemn without compassion.  We reject without responding.  Leaving those that have fallen sitting in the muck feeling like they have no choice but to pull themselves up and figure out how to live up to the standard that has been set up.  A standard none of us can live up to. 

If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you.  If they listen to you, you have won them over.  But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' If they will refuse to listen, tell if to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.  Matthew 18:15-17

How did Jesus treat pagans and tax collectors?  He asked them to follow him.  He ate with them at their table.  He touched their hearts, and drew him near.  He did that for me, because I was one of them.  Just as you are.

How will the world respond to such situations?  Is the world going to help pick up those that have fallen under the weight of the consequences from their own actions?

How are God's people going to respond?  Will we join in the droves of others calling for their heads and rejoicing that they have gotten their comeuppance or will we crawl down into the mire and stretch out our hand just as God did for us when He came out of time and space and gave us His Son.

This well written and well timed quote was said by Savannah Guthrie, though I do not know if it was she who penned it, "We are grappling with a dilemma that so many people have faced these past few weeks:  How do you reconcile your love for someone with the revelation that they have behaved badly and I don't know the answer to that."

Whether regarding this exact type of situation or countless others, we each come across many times in life when we have to look and see that the person we created in our minds does not match up to the behaviors that come out.  We are looking for perfection in the imperfect and are thrown off guard when expectations are dashed.

It's easy to love on the lovable.  It's a joy to bring a parent food for their new babe or to walk alongside a family lovingly opening their home to a fostered child.  Holding the hand and praying with a friend who is battling an illness is heart-wrenching but healing.  Donating funds to veterans who served and fought for your freedom seems like the least you can do. But Jesus didn't stop when it came to touching the lives of the socially acceptable problems so I don't believe we, as His people, can either.

The hands and feet of Jesus keep walking and keep grabbing the lives of those who feel like they have fallen so short it's as if they are a million miles away.  The hands and feet of Jesus leave 99 of their sheep in a pasture and searched high and low for that one so that it knows it will never be alone.  

We reconcile our love for someone when compared to their faults because we know we too are faulty.  Perfect love doesn't go away when someone fails us.  Perfect love doesn't go away when we fail another.   Perfect love is made stronger as we walk alongside each other guided by a Perfect Spirit given to us by a Perfect Savior.

The firestorms are not over.  They started a long time ago and will continue until the end of this earth.  I don't know how the world will respond, but I pray His people will respond, that I will respond, in the same way I was responded to, with an unconditional love and a direct arrow pointing to Jesus.

Pray I'll be able to do that, I'll be praying for you.